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God's Grace on Me,

It's amazing, despite our trespasses, how our Daddy, forgive, and not only forgive but forget our sins, because of all the sacrifices His Beloved Son has done for us. That's Unconditional Love. His Great Love for us make us unknowing change our personality for the better.

I know at times, or rather lately, I have been feeling kinda out of sort. I do not want to attribute my attitude change to pregnancy, as I know, as what my Father has given me, righteousness, grace and favor in Him, I would not be waived by pure FEELINGS. I came to realise that if you try so much with your self effort that you should not lead by your feelings, you are so doom to be led by your FEELINGS!! Don't know if you get what I mean. Anyhow, I plainly rest myself in Him, not give myself so much strive to overcome what I am going through. I know our Sweet Daddy will make all things turn out for good.

Lately, I've been feeling unloved, (I know I should not feel this way), by my Olive Tree. What's wrong with me? Probably, he is so caught up with his work, and also excite, about his new job, and also the soon to be DADDY excitement, clouded him, that I feel he does not treasure my presence anymore. I feel that he is less intimate with me, only on the part that he wants to feel his little blessed champion in me, he will touch my tummy. Hiaz... I am paranoid?! Not really. There are so many issues that happened in the last 2 weeks with him, that I don't want to expound further. Just hope I won't be too sensitive.

Honestly, I can't wait to get back to work (finding a new job). Maybe with work, I would not have time to think so much about how my Olive Tree is treating me. I know he loves me, and cares for me, but I am demanding when it comes to displaying of affection. I am such that I need cuddle, support, hugs, etc. It's more of my insecurity, I think. I don't think I am the only woman here to think this way. Wish I would be more independent. I know the other side of my rebellious fellow is always wanting to jump out, but thank Daddy for putting that part of me away.

Without Jesus's love, I wouldn't be what I am today, and have come so far. I solely lean on to Him for feeding, of my love, understanding, patience. Thank you, JESUS for what you've done!

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